Living in fear of


Living in fear of


I recently met with another good friend
One with whom we had vowed
That friendship never would end.
But there were twists in my life
That turned the talk to
What was happening at home…
And That, my friend was living in fear of…

He appeared to be scared
When I told him my new job.
He had no idea what it involved,
So he told me you’re fine,
You’re doing a great job.
Then he walked far away
And was busy when called.

But I was worn out
And I needed some help
The hours were long
And sleep was disrupt,
I was always on call,
No respite at all,
And my friend was not there now, ever at all.

Then depression came calling,
And he settled right in,
And nobody noticed
Nobody at all that
I was losing the fight
And my job was at stall.
Nobody helped, no one at all.

I didn’t believe that
I had changed all that much,
But he seemed to think that
I wanted to use him as a crutch.
I wanted no such of a thing,
And I assured him as much,
But he was living in fear of…

How I managed to fight on
I really could not say
And nor right onto this day
I do not have the answer
To the absence of friend
Except that he suffers
From the very fear of…living in fear of…

For the very fear of…
Scares the many away.
They fear they’ll be asked
To do what I do day in and day out
So they assure me I’m doing a good job
And they think that I look well.
But it is not I who is living in fear of…


About admin

Judge at 6th Rabindrinath Tagore Awards - International - English Poetry Contest Author of Ann, A Tribute, and Chasing a Butterfly, A story of love and loss to Acceptance
This entry was posted in Alzheimer's, Care Giving, Choices, Dementia, Fear, Friends, Poetry and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Living in fear of

  1. Ah, yes. The people who you thought would be there for you. Family, friends. People you were always there for. And then they don’t show up and you feel betrayed. Charley and I know the feeling well. His own children always are too busy. But he is never too busy for them or his grandchildren. Such a great dad with such selfish children. Like your friend. But we have each other. And you were there for her and you had each other. You can hold your head up high, my friend. You are a far better man than most.

  2. admin says:

    You are real dear Claremary. I thank you deeply for your kind and warning words.

  3. We truly are kindred spirits with kindred experiences.

  4. admin says:

    I like that.

  5. admin says:

    Like I said, you are a real dear. Thank you.

  6. You’re very welcome.

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