Meet My Partner
Meet My Partner, you’re gonna love him.
He will win you over like he did to me.
Living with him is living out on a limb,
Life with my partner is a dizzying spree.
He’s got his fingers deep into my heart,
And he’ll never let me go, he loves me so.
I’ve lost all resistance, I don’t want to part,
I feel that my skin’s all aglow…
But then he twisted the knife
Deep into my heart
He drained my resistance
Till I wanted to depart
And he won’t let me go
His grip is so firm
And I am so tired
That I have to confirm
That I am crazy and he is right…
The Third Partner
Meet my new partner, his name is Dementia,
He’s a son of a bitch and he’ll win every time.
You cannot divorce him; recommend him? Nn-tia
He’s stolen everything that used to be mine.
The third partner, you and me – and Dementia,
Who insists on the dominant position.
He hogs the limelight, the lunch, the minutia,
With his primary A-type disposition.
If you see him a-coming, run like hell,
If he catches you, he’ll ring your bell;
Call the police, hire an assassin,
Do everything you can to excise him.
For he WILL seduce you and make you his own,
Then with a twist of the knife, he’ll excise your heart.
Shun him, run away from him, shoot him in the foot,
For as a third partner, he makes a good foe.
In passing a compliment, he spouts filthy soot,
And from then on, your life will be filled with woe.
Meet my third partner, uninvited as Three,
He’s stolen everything that used to be me.
–H. W. Bryce
*Inspired by a response in Crisis Prevention site, “You’ve got a third partner here, and its name is Dementia.”